If I could be where you are
by fayoregoddessofcourage
Summary: After being asked by Gandalf to join Thorins company, Súldes meets Fili and Kili the inseparable brothers who's brotherly conflict and love remind her of the ones she has loved and lost . She finds herself falling for Kili,but will she love and lose him too?Sorry I suck at summaries :)Please read this is my first fanfiction I hope you enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

**_AN:_Súldes(Wind (sûl) Young Woman (dess) (sûl+dess)Happy Birthday to my best friend Havalah!**

_Chapter one_

_Many Greetings_

The air was warm and soft as I walked under the trees in Hobbiton. I had been traveling for about a day since I had seen Gandalf in Bree. It was no hardship getting here. My horse Kellis enjoyed riding by the soft streams and warm grass. It was quiet, except for a few birds and every once in a while I would hear far off singing or talking. I usually went the opposite direction when I heard that because I didn't want anyone to see me because I felt I would probably disturb their whole day by instilling curiosity. They looked like the kind of folk that when "odd" people would be seen they would be talked about for weeks. But they seemed to be simply innocent little people, just happy to live here in simple beauty. It was beginning to get dark and I could see lights in the little homes in the hills far off "Would you like a break Kellis?"I said. The Horse neighed happily as I took off the bridle and let him wander a bit. I snacked on berries from little bushes that were strewn about the forest. I laid next to a tree and started to think about the journey Gandalf had asked me to go on, "The journey will be long and treacherous Súldes. I cannot guarantee you will survive." Gandalf had said with lines of concern on his brow. "I know you are strong and you have much courage, you will need it."

I shot up realizing I had fallen asleep thinking. It was dark now but the moon was big and bright so it made it easy to see. _Damn it I thought_! I whistled for Kellis and he came trotting from behind two trees with a little happy horse neigh and greeted me with a nudge. I pet his white main for a while and then put his bridle back on. I leapt on his back and started on my way down the road. I passed little farms and hobbit holes. I started to hear voices from around the bend "Evening Oin ,Gloin ,Dori ,Ori ,Nor i,Bifur ,Bofur ,Bombur." which was followed by many a "Good evening Gandalf". "_Oh phew it's just Gandalf."I thought_. "Ah there you are Súldes!" said Gandalf as I came round the bend. I was met by many skeptical glances. "Mae g'ovannen Gandalf (well met)"I said as I got off my horse. I bowed to Gandalf and then everyone was introduced to me at which I respectfully bowed my head to the dwarves. I temporarily tied Kellis to a post and turned to face the door with the group after Dori had knocked. "Will you get off my cloak Ori!" said Dori with anger. "I'm not on your cloak! It's Bofur! " said Ori in a rather defensive tone. The battering when on for a few moments and then suddenly the door opened and all of them tumbled in. I bent down like Gandalf to look inside and saw quite a frustrated hobbit. One dwarf after another filtered in greeting Bilbo. Finally I came up last "Mae l'ovannen Bilbo Baggins" I said "I am Súldes Celebrindal".

"Hello!" said Bilbo with slightly less frustration and a tad bit of curiosity. Bilbo's attention was immediately caught by some rather large noises in a different part of the house and he rushed off to see what it was. Gandalf followed in the same direction but I stayed to take off my gear like the other dwarves had done. I put my sword, bow, quiver, and the rest of my gear in a neat pile next to the door. I slipped out the door to take care of Kellis. "Kellis my friend?" I said softly to make sure I didn't startle him from sleep. He looked at me with droopy ears and a nicker. I walked to him and removed his gear and placed it on the ground, and untied him. "You are free to roam but be sure to stay out of gardens "I said with gentle nudge. He neighed and nudged back and started to wander away. I picked up his gear, went back inside and set his stuff by mine. I looked around the house and spotted Gandalf so I started to walk toward him but bonked my head on one of the low ceilings. "You will have to watch out for those" said Gandalf with a knowing smile. "Are hobbits always so messy?" I asked looking around the room. "No, actually" said Gandalf chuckling "I fear that is a result of the dwarves. We are going to eat after everything gets set up. Will you join us?". "I will! Ni 'lassui (thank you)" I said. Gandalf left to help and I left to find the bathroom. Once I found it and finished what I had come in there for I looked at myself in the mirror. I was dirty and had grass in my hair. So I took off some of my garments and washed my face and arms. After I brushed my hair I fishtail braided a small part on both sides near my forehead and ears and brought it to the back and tied it with a strap of leather.*sigh* it's been a while since I've done my hair. Hmm doesn't look half bad. I put back on my garments and walked to the hall where everyone was.

Kili was sitting next to fili eating and laughing as dwalin poured some ale into oin's ear trumpet when Fili saw an elf walk into the hall. He immediately started hitting his brother Kili with his elbow, when he got his attention he pointed and stared. Kili looked and nearly choked on his drink. Kili kicked Fili under the table and slapped his hand down and then hit fili in the arm. "Act cool!" Kili whispered harshly to Fili! Kili hadn't seen such a beautiful being in his life (not that he had seen many beautiful elves in his time)! Gandalf introduced her "Dwalin ,Balin , Fili, Kili, this is Súldes Celebrindal ." he said "Súldes meet Dwalin ,Balin ,Fili ,and Kili". At the sound of his name he bowed his head and then winked with a huge smile. She smiled back and blushed. It was the cutest thing he had ever seen. He couldn't stop staring at her long blond hair and those eyes! He had never seen anyone with one deep green eye and a blue one! She was one beautiful elf and he was one single dwarf and if he could say so himself a handsome dwarf at that. She sat down across from Gandalf and didn't even eat half as much as the dwarves.

Everyone was laughing, drinking, and eating. And I couldn't stop myself from glancing at Fili and Kili who would always look back and wink or smile. It made me feel all warm and accepted but….something about them brought back a pain in my heart I hadn't felt in years. A feeling I didn't want to think about where it came from. It was in the past and the past sometimes has to be forgotten. "She's looking at me again!" Kili excitedly whispered to Fili. "Are you kidding? She's looking at me!" said fili with a stomp on Kili's foot. I watched them hit each other then kili looked up nodded and smiled then hit Fili. It went on until everyone had finished eating and Gandalf and Bilbo were walking around. I was putting things back into the pantry when I heard Bilbo complaining about the dwarves when Ori came up and asked him what he was supposed to do with his plate. "Here Ori, give it to me!" said Fili as he grabbed it and tossed it to Kili who then tossed it to Bifur. I came out to watch. Fili tossed more dishes and concern for his plates was written all over Bilbo's face. "Excuse me! That is my mother's best West Farthing pottery, it's over a hundred years old!" exclaims Bilbo running toward kili and seeing Bofur clashing cutlery together. "And can you please not do that? You'll blunt them!" said Bilbo. "Oh, did you hear that, lads? He says we'll blunt the knives!" says Bofur smiling continuing to clash cutlery. Kili starts to sing "Blunt the knives, bend the forks!". Fili joins in "Smash the bottles and burn the corks!". All the dwarves joined in the song.

_Chip the glasses and crack the plates...that's what Bilbo Baggins hates! Cut the cloth, tread on the fat, leave the bones on the bedroom mat, pour the milk on the pantry floor, splash the wine on every door! Dump the crocks in a boiling bowl, pound them up with a thumping pole, and when you're finished, if they are whole...send them down the hall to roll! That's what Bilbo Baggins hates! _

The song ended in cheers and claps. I laughed when I saw Bilbo's face when he pushed his way through the dwarves to find his dishes clean and safe on the table.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: I would have had this chapter up earlier but my computer broke down and it won't be fixed til next week. Im sorry for any typos, the device im using to write isn't very good. The next chapter will have a lot more action in it. Echuio : wake up. Nana: Mommy. Ada: Daddy. Nessa er : young one.**

Chapter 2 : Convincing Thorin

Bilbo sighed and gave Gandalf a look that seemed to me to say "See what I mean?". I walked off quite amused . I wandered through Bilbo's house looking at all the books and paintings he had. Kili watched as Súldes left the room. He started to get up to follow." Kili! Put the dishes away will you!" Said Dwalin. He reluctantly picked up some dishes. Fili chuckled at Kili as he got up to follow her. "You too Fili!" Dwalin said while walking away from the two now annoyed brothers. They both stacked the dishes in their rightful places and then tried to trip each other as they ran to find Súldes. I had stopped to look at some maps that were hanging on the wall ,when I turned to see Fili and Kili running toward me and sliding to a stop( Kili at my left and Fili at my right.). _Dear Lord I'm surrounded I thought_. "Hey there las!"said Kili with an adorable smile." Hello!"said Fili with a wink trying to be as sexy as possible." Hi!" I said looking away from Fili so I wouldn't blush . "He has quite the maps for a hobbit." I said looking back at the map"Not that I know many hobbits. They just seem too content to want to travel.". "Yes, its quite nice actually!"said Kili."Yes it is " I said sounding a little far off While running my fingers over large forest on the map that said Lothlórien."Is that forest where you are from?"asked Fili."Yes I was born there." I said hastily removing my fingers.

Just then there was a knock at the door and everyone in the house fell silent."He is here." I heard Gandalf say from another room. Bilbo walked to the door with Gandlaf, but Gandalf stopped Bilbo when he reached me saying "I want to introduce you last Súldes. He is not fond of elves, so it will be a small hardship to get him to accept you into the company. Just leave the talking to me and I will convince him.". He gave me a quick smile and walked on with Bilbo." Don't worry we got your back!" Kili said smiling . He dragged me around the corner so I wouldn't be seen. Fili and Kili nodded to each other and left to greet Thorin. "Gandalf, I thought you said this place would be easy to find." Said Thorin. I could hear him taking off his gear." I lost my way twice. I never would have found it at all if it wasn't for the mark on the door." Continued Thorin. "Mark? Theres no mark on that door it was painted a week ago!" Said Bilbo coming to the rescue of his doors reputation. "There is a mark. I put it there."said Gandalf closing the door." Bilbo baggins meet the leader of our company ,Thorin oaken shield" said Gandalf." So ...this is the hobbit. Tell me Mr. Baggins have you done much fighting? Axe or sword what is your weapon of choice?" Said Thorin circling him." Well I do have some skill at conkers if you must know, but I fail to see why thats relevant. "Said Bilbo." I thought as much. He looks more like grocer than a burgler." said Thorin with a smile as others chuckled. Thorin turned to leave but Gandalf stopped him saying " And this is Súldes Celebrindal.". I stepped from behind the corner and Thorin slowly turned to face me. I bowed low." And why Gandalf have you asked an elf to join my company?" said Thorin with disdain in his voice." Because she is worthy."said Gandalf."She is a woman!" said Thorin scowling. "She has seen battle and has been trained well! She also has skill with a bow!" said Gandalf. Kili high fived himself in his head." I will not have her join!" said Thorin. "SHE IS NOT THE ONE THAT ABANDONED YOU THAT DAY THORIN OAKEN SHIELD!" exclaimed Gandalf the room had grown slightly dark and he had seemed a little taller as he said those words. " Fine!" said Thorin storming off.

Damn...I don't know if that could have gotten any more awkward. Fili and Kili waited till everyone had left them to go running up and slap me on the back. Though I think if Fili hadn't of hit him Kili would have given me a hug." Congratulations! You are part of the group now!" they both said. They took my hands and led me to the room where the table was. Thorin was sitting at the honor seat of the table where someone had gotten him some food. Fili slid onto the seat ,then Kili, and then me. To Fili's horror he now realized his brother got to sit next to me and not him. He slammed his foot down in Kili's, but Kili only grinned wider. Fili did not do anything further so he wouldn't catch the attention of his uncle. " And what news from the meeting in Ered luin? Did they all come?"said Balin." Aye, I heard voice from all seven kingdoms." said Thorin with a slight smile and all the dwarves cheered approvingly." And what do the dwarfs of the Iron Hills say? Is Dáin with us?" said Dwalin. Thorin took a deep breath then said " They will not come. They say this quest is ours and ours alone.". All the dwarfs started talking among themselves." You're ..going on a quest?" said Bilbo hesitantly." Bilbo my dear fellow!"said Gandalf " Let us have a little more light.". Bilbo nodded his head and went to get a candle. "Far to the east," began Gandalf unrolling a map he pulled from his cloak"over ranges and rivers,beyond woodlands and wastelands. Lies a single solitary peek.". " The ..Lonely Mountain." said Bilbo reading the map. " Aye, Oin has read the portents and the portents say it is time!"said Gloin. Various dwarves rolled their eyes or sighed in annoyance." The ravens have been seen flying back to the mountain as it has been foretold!" said Oin"When the birds of Yore return to Erebo...the reign of the beast will end."."Uh, what beast?" said Bilbo walking back from the pantry. " That would be a reference to Smaug the Terrible... chiefest and greatest calamity of our age." said Bofur" Air-born fire breather. Teeth like razors, claws like meat hooks. Very fond of precious metals.". "Yes, I know what a dragon is." said Bilbo. "I'm not afraid! I'm up for it! I'll give him a taste of dwarfish iron right up his jacksie!" said Ori standing up from his chair."Good lad Ori!" said Nori as Dori pulled him down. " The task would be difficult enough with an army behind us...but we only only a number of fourteen. And not fourteen of the best...or brightest" said Balin. "HERE NOW! Who are you calling dim?"exclaimed Nori slightly offended. Various dwarf started to mumble to each other." We may be few in number but we're fighters..TO THE LAST DWARF!" said Fili slamming his hand down on the table." And you forget we have a wizard in our company. Gandalf would have killed hundreds of dragons in his time!" said Kili. " Well now I wouldn't say that." said Gandalf." How man then?" asked Dori. " What?" said Gandalf slightly flustered." How many dragons have you killed?" said Dori. Gandalf held in his smoke and started to cough." Go on! Give us a number!" said Dori. All the dwarfs started yelling at each other, It went on till Thorin stood up and shouted "ENOOUGH!...If we have read the signs do you not think others will have read them too? Rumors have begun to spread. The dragon Smaug has not been seen for sixty years. Eyes look to the east to the mountain , assessing, wondering, weighing the risk. Perhaps the vast wealth of our people now lies unprotected. Do we sit back while others claim what is rightfully ours? Or do we seize this chance to take back Erebor?"." You forget the front gate is sealed. There is no way into the mountain." said Balin. " That my dear Balin is not entirely true" said Gandalf pulling a dwarfish Key from his sleeve. " How came you by this? " asked Thorin. " It was given to me by your father by Thrain, for safe keeping. It is yours now." said Gandalf handing the key to Thorin." If there is a key, there must be a door." said Fili. " These runes speak of a hidden passage to the lower halls." said Gandalf. " There's another way in." said Kili smiling. " Well if we can find it, but dwarf doors are invisible when closed. The answer lies somewhere in this map, and I do not have the skill to find it, but there are others in Middle Earth who can. The task I have in mind will take a great deal of stealth, and no small amount of courage. But if we are careful and clever, I believe it can be done."said Gandalf. "That's why we need a burglar." said Ori. "hmm, and a good one too! An expert, I'd imagine.' said Bilbo looking at the map." And are you?" said Gloin. Every one turned their eyes to Bilbo." Am I what?" said Bilbo looking up. " He said he's an expert!Hey!" said Oin." Me?! No! No, No, No, I..I'm not a burglar I've never stolen a thing in my life." said Bilbo. " And I'm afraid I have to agree with Mr. Baggins. He's hardly burglar material." said Balin."Aye, there's no place for gentle folk who can neither fight nor fend for themselves." said Dwalin giving me a look." He's fine!' said Kili. All the dwarfs started talking over each other then Gandalf rose saying " Enough! If I say Bilbo Baggins is a burglar then a Burglar he is! Hobbits are remarkably light on their feet. In fact, they can pass unseen by most if they choose, and while the dragon is accustomed to the smell of dwarf, the scent of hobbit is all but unknown to him, which gives us a distinct advantage. You asked me to find the 14th and 15th members of this company , and I have chosen them. There is alot more to them than their appearances suggest. And Mr . Baggins has a great deal more to offer than any of you know, including himself."." You must trust me on this." said Gandalf looking at Thorin." Very well, we'll do it your way" said Thorin. I heard Bilbo say no again then Thorin said " Give them the contract.". "Ori, we're off."said Bofur . "Please."said Bilbo. Balin rose and passed a contract to Thorin who then passed it to Bilbo. Bilbo took it and started reading the contract out loud. Balin passed a contract to Dori who then passed it to me. I read it then signed in the proper place then handed it back to Dori who passed it back to Balin. Balin read it then nodded at Thorin." Now it's official!" Kili whispered to me as if I had just accepted his proposal. Thorin and Gandlaf were whispering when I heard Bilbo say "Incineration?". " Oh, aye, he'll melt the flesh off your bones in a blink of an eye."said Bofur. I could see the color leaving Bilbos face." You alright, laddie?" said Balin." Huh? Yeah, I fe...I feel a bit faint." said Bilbo resting his hands on his legs trying to think of something else." Think furnace, with wings" continued Bofur."I..I..I need air." said Bilbo." Flash of light, searing pain. then puff! You're nothing more than a pile of ash!"said Bofur. Bilbo stood there for a moment looking at us,then said "Nope" then crashed to the floor

. "Oh, very helpful ,Bofur" said Gandalf.I rose up from my chair and made my way towards Bilbo. I swung him over my shoulder and went to a room with a fireplace. I laid him down a little ways from the fire and stuck a pillow under his head."Echuio" I said. Bilbo stirred and opened his eyes. He looked at me looking quite confused."How did I get here?"said Bilbo rubbing his eyes." I carried you. You passed out." I said. "Thank you"said Bilbo. Gandalf and a few of the dwarfs including Fili and Kili had come in to check on Bilbo. "How are you feeling?" Gandalf asked Bilbo."I will be alright." replied Bilbo. "Sit down by the fire for a while.' I said. Bilbo got up and sat in his chair. I walked out of the room into the hall and Fili and Kili followed me. "That was quite impressive!" said Fili."Aye, it was!" said Kili. "Thank you. It wasn't hard." I said." Do you often pick up men like that?" asked Kili." Uh, no, only when I need to." I replied."Only when you need to?" Kili asked. Fili completely lost it. He tackled Kili and soon had him in a locked under his arm. Thorin walked by and saw them wrestling as I laughed and watched. "Fili! Kili!" said Thorin. They immediately stopped and looked up and saw him. Thorin walked away. I was still slightly laughing as I helped Fili and Kili to their feet. We walked back to the room I had put Bilbo in. Thorin was singing. Soon all the dwarfs joined in either humming or singing along.**  
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_Far over, the misty mountains cold. To dungeons deep and caverns old. We must away ere break of day. To find our long-forgotten gold. The pines were roaring on the height. The winds were moaning in the night. The fire was red, it flaming spread. The trees like torches blazed with_ _light._

The song ended and every one started to set up a makeshift bed. I set mine up not far from where Fili and Kili had set up theirs. I watched the fire for a while as I lay on my stomach. I slowly started to nod off.

She's so cute watching the fire like that, Kili thought,I wonder if she likes short guys.

*_sleep induced memory*_

I watched the sunset waiting for him to return."Nana, since Ada is gone can you tell me a story?" said a little girl with long wavy hair just like mine. "Of course,nessa er." I said gathering her up in my arms and bringing her back inside to our cottage. I brought her up to her room and set her on the bed."What do you want to hear about?" I asked."I waaaaant..to hear about the Beren and Lúthien. Their story is sort of like you and Adas story right?"said the little girl. "Sort of, yes." I said smiling.

_* back to the present*_

Kili watched Súldes as she slept. she must be having a good dream. She's smiling. This young beautiful elf was absolutely enchanting him.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:. Tolo:come. Enedien meaning: centre/ middle(ened):daughter of/ girl (ien). Gi melin: I love you. Iellig: my daughter. Ollo vae: sweet dreams/ dream. Tolo ar nin: come with me. Na van: when.*Gellon ned i galar i chent gîn ned i gladhog :I love to see your eyes shine when you laugh. Novaer :Farewell. I suggest listening to Secrect Garden- Hymn to Hope while reading about her past.**

_Chapter 3_

_On the road_

I woke up. My dream still fresh in my mind I felt a familiar pain in my heart as I ran my shaking hands through my messy hair. Tears began to swell in my eyes. _No not now... I thought_._ I'm surrounded by dwarfs and I'm not gonna let them see me cry_. I quickly wiped them away and got up. All the dwarfs lay sleeping strewn about the room. I quietly picked up my bed and put it away. I carefully stepped over the dwarfs to the bathroom. After washing my face and hands I unbraided my hair, brushed it, and got it wet. As it dried it naturally curled making it wavy.

Kili woke up side ways. His legs on top of his brothers back. He removed his legs and stretched, making a low sort of growling. Fili opened his eyes and immediately curled back up trying to block out the sunlight. Kili looked around. Súldes was gone! He scrambled up and grabbed Filis face so he faced the spot where Súldes was last night. Fili quickly got into his feet. Fili and Kili looked at each other with worried looks." Lets split up and look for her" said Fili. Kili nodded and started walking down the hallway. _What if she left after last night, Kili thought_. As he passed the bathroom he heard some rustling. He slowly backed up a few steps and Súldes walked out curly/wavy hair trailing down her back. She was even more beautiful that last night.( equivalent of..DAAAAAAAAMN you so fine girl.).

I opened the door and almost walked into Kili. Kili quickly regained his composure and hugged me. I was a little bit confused but I went with the flow. " I thought you left us!" Kili said pulling away and giving a huge smile. " No I didn't. I signed the contract remember?" I said." Oh, yeah! That's right!" said Kili. "Shall we make breakfast?" asked Kili."Of course!" I said. Kili was just to cute to say no to. We walked to the kitchen and I saw Fili coming from around the corner. He looked at me for just a second before running up to me and then giving me a quick hug."You didn't leave us after all!" said Fili." I would never." I replied."Fili, will you help us make breakfast?"said Kili."Sure!" replied Fili. We all went to the pantry and grabbed pots. pans, sausages, eggs ,ect. I started cooking the sausages and smiled as Fili and Kili started tossing food to each other. Every once in a while Fili or Kili would toss me something either to eat or to cook. Ori walked in looking like he was still slightly asleep, but he soon woke all the way up and helped us with breakfast. Soon everything was done and all the dwarfs had awakened and they came to eat. Eventually Gandalf got up and ate too." The hobbit? Is he coming?" I asked Gandalf." He said no but I am sure he will." He said smiling. After everyone had eaten, we cleaned up and started packing up. I grabbed my gear by the door and stepped outside. I smiled as the fresh air washed over me. There were ponies and a horse tied up to the fences. I walked down the lane a bit then called for my horse"Kellis!Tolo!". I heard him galloping towards me. He was soon here, he happily nickered and nuzzled me. " How was your night?" I said softly while putting on his gear. He whinnied, looked at me and then at the ponies as if to say _well you weren't there so I hung out with the_ _ladies._ Once I had finished he struck a pose in front of the ponies, his armour gleamed in the sun. _Oh boy, I thought_.

Fili and Kili stepped out to take care of their ponies. Súldes was smiling at a great white stallion. " Is that your horse?" Fili asked. Súldes looked back at them "Yes, he is." I said."What is his name?" asked Kili." Kellis." I replied with a smile. Kellis noticed them and walked toward them and started sniffing. After he was done he looked at each of them one at a time dead in the eyes as if he was reading their minds,Fili first and then Kili. Kili shifted uncomfortably. Kellis nickered almost as if he was laughing and walked away. Kili let out a sigh of relief and continued with his pony. Gandalf and all the rest of the dwarfs walked out the house, gear in hand. After every one had gotten their pony saddle and packed we set off. I was at the end of the company with Fili at my left and Kili at my right. " Do you think he will come?" asked Kili."Who? Bilbo? He may. Gandalf believes he will, so I think he might." I said." Oh, wouldn't bet on that lass" I heard Nori say." Why not?" said Oin " I bet he will."." Alright then." replied Nori. All the rest of the dwarfs made wagers too." I said it. Didn't I say it? Coming here was a waste of time." I heard Dori say." That's true enough." said Gloin." Ridiculous notion! Use a hobbit? A halfling? Whose idea was it any way?" continued Dori. Dori was interrupted by Bilbo running up from behind shouting "Wait! Wait!". Thorin ordered everyone to a stop." I signed it." said Bilbo handing his contract to Balin. Balin looked at it then said"Everything appears to be in order. Welcome, Master Baggins ..to the company of Thorin Oaken shield.". Everyone chuckled and started talking.

" Give him a pony." said Thorin." No. no that won't be necessary. Thank you. I'm sure I can keep up on foot. Iv'e done my fair share of walking holidays, you know. Even got as far Frogmorton once." protested Bilbo. Bilbo yelled as Fili and Kili hosted him up and onto his awaiting pony."Come on, Nori! Pay up!" said Oin. Nori tossed back a small bag of coins to Oin."Thanks lad!" said Oin." What was it like..living in a forest as a child? Did you have any siblings?" asked Kili as I caught up to them. " No, I didn't have any siblings... I was their first child and my mother died giving birth to me." I replied. " Oh, I'm sorry." said Kili lowering his head and looking to the side a little. " No, you are fine. I may not have had siblings, but I did have friends. We climbed trees and practiced with bows together. I hope someday you will see my home. It is the fairest of all the dwellings of my people. There are no trees like the trees of that land. For in the autumn their leaves do not fall, but turn to gold. Not till the spring and the new green opens do they fall, and then the boughs are laden with yellow flowers; and the floor of the wood is golden, and golden is the roof, and its pillars are of silver, for the bark of the trees is smooth and grey." I said. " Maybe you could take me!" said Kili with a wink. Fili rolled his eyes. " Yes, maybe I could." I said winking back. Kili slowly turned his grinning face to Fili who was fuming with anger. "No, wait ,wait stop!" I heard Bilbo yell "we have to turn around.". "What on earth is the matter?" asked Gandalf." I forgot my handkerchief.". "Here. Use this!" said Bofur throwing Bilbo a piece of his clothing he had tore off. Everyone chuckled, 'Move on." said Thorin.

We rode on til the sun was setting and we set up camp near a cliff. Bofur got dinner ready as we took care of the horses. I was removing the saddle off one of the ponies,minty I think it was. Kili was next to me taking the saddle off of daisy. Kellis snuck up behind him and shoved him, making Kili fall, tripping us both so we tumbled onto the ground with Kili on top of me. Kellis trotted away with a whinny." Sorry about that!" said Kili smiling.I blushed hard. He might of said sorry but he most certainly didn't mean it. To be quite honest...I didn't mind. Kili was stealing a piece of my heart every time he smiled at me. He quickly got off of me and finished taking the saddle off of daisy. He walked over to the fire where Fili sat. I laid down not far from them and slowly fell asleep.

_* sleep induced memory*_

"When will Ada be home, Nana?" asked the little girl after I had finished the story." Soon, Enedien."I said "Go to sleep now, gi melin, Ollo vae.". It was dark now. All the stars had come out. I prayed to Elbereth to bring him home safely. I went back inside but the door burst open almost right after. I was grabbed from behind and hosted into the air. He twirled me around for a moment then set me down. I turned around and threw my arms around his neck." I missed you, Arathor!"I said laying kisses on his lips and cheek. "I missed you too,Súldes!" said Arathor."I brought you something." He said smiling."Really? What?" I said laying another kiss on his cheek."Tolo ar nin." Arathor replied. He grabbed me by my hand and led me outside to our stables. A white foal lay in one of the stalls."She's beautiful!" I said turning to him. "It's a he." He said laughing. I gave him a thank you kiss and we walked back inside." How did hunting that pack of orcs go?" I asked ." We lost track of them, many of the other rangers believe they were leading us away from a larger orc pack not far from them." Arathor replied " I am heading back with them.". "Na van?" I asked." Tomorrow." He replied.I sighed and looked at the floor." So soon?" I said."Yes, I am a ranger. It is my job to keep this village safe." said Arathor in a slightly stern voice." I know." I said looking up at him."I am sorry." I apologized. "It's ok." He said taking my face in his hands and kissing me. The next day we were woken by small hugs and kisses." Tiiime to get up!" said Enedien. Arathor slid out of bed and picked up his little girl swinging her around the room." Did you miss me?" he asked." Of course!" she said defensively and kissed him on the cheek. He set her down and picked up his wife." Good morning,Súldes." He said pulling me close and kissing me ." Good morning." I said smiling. Soon after breakfast he was ready to leave. " I will miss you." I said as he got the last things he needed." Am I that handsome?" He said smiling. I mockingly punched him as I laughed."Gellon ned i galar i chent gîn ned i gladhog." He said as he held my hand in his."Novaer." He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed me. He pulled away and saw Enedien standing there impatiently waiting to say goodbye."Novaer,Iellig." He said smiling. "Gi melin." she said. He picked her up and kissed her on her forehead." I love you too." He replied. He gently set her down, turned and left.**  
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_*back to present*_

Sounds of wargs howling and orcs screeching startled me from my sleep. I clutched my heart and tears began to flow...I missed them so much. I missed the life I had, but I knew deep down someday I would have to move on.

**A/N: Aaaaand that's it for this week folks :) hope you liked this chapter. Don't forget to leave a comment! Happy Thanksgiving!**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N : The cloak given by Lady Galadriel was actually a wedding gift. Arathor was a ranger that she met when Aragorn came to visit **Lothlórien**. Súldes, Arathor and her daughter lived in a village in Rohan since Arathor spent most of his life there. The village was not far from ****Lothlórien.**** Uma: yes. Before you read the description of the swords please visit this site it will help you visualize it :) www. medievallifestyle armor-and-weapons/ medieval-sword .html. After you search the link click on Parts of a medieval sword-medieval lifestyle. Like seriously visit the site or you will be lost! I got the sparring scene idea from another fanfiction I read :) The song **Súldes sings is called breath of life. The song is featured in The Lord of The Rings Two Towers when Aragorn is floating down the river after being tossed off a cliff. I highly suggest listening to it while, before or after you read it :)****

Chapter four:

Old and New Things

I lowered myself back down onto my bed watching the fire ,and silently let the tears fall. "What was that?" asked Bilbo slightly concerned. "Orcs."said Kili who was staying up with Fili to keep watch. " Orcs?" asked Bilbo quickly walking back to the fire. Thorin jolted up from all the noise." Throat-cutters, there'll be dozens of them out there." replied Fili " The Lone-lands are crawling with them."."They attack in the wee small hours of the night. Quick and quiet no screams, just lots of blood." said Kili taking advantage of Bilbos fear. Fili and Kili chuckled at Bilbos worried look. His laughter stung my heart as I shut my eyes tight trying to keep back my tears._ How could you laugh at such a thing, I thought_." You think that's funny? You think a night raid by Orcs is a joke?" said Thorin sternly and rising from the place he had been sleeping." We didn't mean anything by it." said Kili lowering his eyes." No, you didn't. You know nothing of the world " said Thorin walking away and standing by the cliff facing the sounds. Kili looked around and saw Súldes laying there... tears running down her face. Was it what I said?. His heart nearly broke. _I didn't mean it.., he thought_.

" Don't mind him, laddie." Said Balin walking up to the fire and leaning against a boulder"Thorin has more cause than most to hate Orcs.". " After the dragon took the Lonely Mountain...King Thror tried to reclaim the ancient dwarf kingdom of Moria. But our enemy had got there first. ...Moria had been taken by legions of Orcs...led by the most vile of all their race: Azog the defiler. The giant Gundabad of Orc...had sworn to wipe out the line of Durin. He began...by beheading the king. ...Thrain, Thorin's father, was driven mad by grief. He went missing. Taken prisoner or killed...we did not know. We were leaderless. Defeat and death... were upon us." continued Balin. "That is when I saw him." Said Balin smiling" A young dwarf prince facing down the pale Orc. He stood alone against this terrible foe. His armor rent..wielding nothing but an oaken branch as a shield. Azog learned that day..that the line of Durin is not so easily broken. Our forces rallied...and drove the Orcs back. And our enemy was defeated. But there was no feast...nor song that night...for our dead was beyond the count of grief. We few had survived. And I thought to myself then...there is one I could follow. There is one...I could call King." Balin finished talking. By now everyone had woken up and had listened to Balin talking. All the dwarfs had stood and were looking at Thorin. I had stopped crying, I felt slightly embarrassed. Oh I hope to the stars none of them saw me.

Thorin turned and started to walk toward the fire." And the pale Orc? What happened to him?" asked Bilbo. "He slunk back into his hole whence he came." said Thorin"That filth died of his wounds long ago.". Every one seemed satisfied with the answer except maybe Balin and Gandalf. Everyone soon fell back to sleep. This time no memories disturbed my sleep.

When we woke up gray clouds had taken over the sky. In the distance rain was already pouring. We were gonna get hit for sure. I got up and started picking up.

Kili woke up with a heavy heart. The sight of Súldes crying had been with him even in his sleep. He desperately wanted to tell her he was sorry. _The first chance I get I will do it, he thought_. He had to wait till after breakfast when she was packing her stuff onto Kellis. He walked up after gathering up some courage. "G'morning Súldes." He said. I turned around and gave him a smile."Good morning to you too." I replied. " I...I'm sorry for joking about the Orcs last night. I didn't mean it." Kili said. His words were full of sorrow and regret. I pulled him into a big hug. "I know. Don't worry about it anymore." I said. And without thinking I gave him a soft kiss on the cheek. Kili looked at me with surprise and it quickly turned into the cutest smile I had ever seen. All the worry had been washed away and the nearly broken heart was healed by the kiss. Kili walked away quite happy. But as He finished up packing he started to realize how much he wanted to give the kiss back.

I was a little surprised I had given him a kiss, but I didn't reprimand myself. I smiled as I finished packing my stuff on Kellis. Kellis had turned his head to watch the whole thing go down. Kellis nickered. " What are you laughing at?" I asked. Kellis shook his mane and whinnied as if to say,_ I'm not telling teehee!_ I chuckled and swung myself onto him. Kili was soon finished packing and had strapped everything on to his horse Minty. Everyone was ready to go and we started on our way. Fili and Kili rode on either side of time we were in the middle of the group. We rode on talking about meaningless things and laughed as Fili got noticeably uncomfortable as the rain got closer.

Soon the rain was upon us and I got out my silver cloak. " That is beautiful." said Kili watching me slide the hood over my honey blonde hair. "Thank you, it was crafted by the Lady Galadriel. A...as a parting gift." I stuttered. No one spoke for a long time. The sound of the rain seemed enough, until Dori spoke up." Here,Mr. Gandalf, can't you do something about this deluge?". " It is raining ,Master Dwarf and it will continue to rain until the rain is done. If you wish to change the weather of the world, you should find yourself another Wizard." replied Gandalf. "Are there any?" asked Bilbo hunching over trying to protect himself from the rain."What?" said Gandalf. " Other Wizards?" asked Bilbo." There are five of us. The greatest of our order is Saruman the white. Then there are the two Blue Wizards. Do you know, I've quite forgotten their names." Said Gandalf. Bilbo nodded his head" And who is the fifth?". "Well, that would be Radagast the Brown." Replied Gandalf. "Is he a great Wizard or is he... more like you?" asked Bilbo. Gandalf looked back at Bilbo " I think he is a very great Wizard, in his own way. He's a gentle soul who prefers the company animals to others. He keeps a watchful eye over the vast forest lands to the east. And a good thing too. For always evil will try to find a foothold in this world.". _  
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In the afternoon the rain stopped and the skies cleared. We stopped to eat and lay our cloaks and other things out to dry on the grass. Fili and Kili sat next to me as we ate. " Would you like to spar to pass the time?" asked Kili after finishing the last bite of his smoked beef jerky." Uma!" I said tossing the core of my apple and hitting a tree making it break into pieces. Kili cocked his to the side "It that a yes?". "Hmm? Oh, I'm sorry. Yes I would love to spar." I said mentally noting to speak the common tongue when around them. Fili, Kili and I walked up the hill so we wouldn't disturb the group.

" Who do you want to fight first?" Asked Fili swinging his sword side to side. " I could take on you both!" I said slyly unsheathing my two swords. We circled for only a second and Kili swung his sword I blocked and spun blocking Filis sword. Our swords clashed as we all tried to get each other off guard. I smiled as I locked Fili and Kilis swords with my one. I headbutt Fili and he lost his sword as he fell back. Kili stood there wide eyed at what he has just seen. His sword was again locked with my other sword. I kissed him on the cheek and his sword was tossed onto the ground. " I win." I said laughing. Fili sat down rubbing his head. " Where did you learn that?" asked Fili."From someone I loved dearly. Does your head hurt still?" I asked. Fili and Kili looked at each other with questioning eyes." Aye, it does." said Fili. " Follow me." I said starting to walk off toward the trees. " Do your swords have names?" asked Kili as I searched the forest. I stopped abruptly near a tree with grey bark and started to peel some off." Yes, they do. " I said handing the bark to Fili. " Chew this." I commanded. " What are they?" asked Kili. I sighed." This is Arathor." I said pulling out one of the long blades. The pommel was silver and the roots of a tree, the grip was a tree trunk, and the the branches became the quillon block and cross guard. The branches on the quillon block wrapped around a bluish grey star shaped stone. "This is Enedien." I said softly, unsheathing the second sword. It too was made of silver but the pommel was a large leaf which became a vine with smaller leaves around the grip. The quillon block was a rose and the vines split and made up the cross guard. In the middle of the rose there was a single diamond stone that was so bright it seemed to be lit with a white flame.

Fili and Kili stood in awe of the beautiful swords. " They are stunning." Kili finally said "They sound as if they have great meaning to you.". " Yes they do." I said softly. Trying to avoid the feelings rising up inside me. " We should get back." I said suddenly realizing we have been up here for a long time. "Aye!" said Kili. We walked back to the group and Ori asked Fili how he got the bruise. After Fili told him, Ori had a good laugh joined by Balin who had come by. We soon had everything packed and we rode on.

We rode til we came to the ruins of a house. Gandalf immediately got off his horse and started looking around the ruins. " We will camp here for the night. Fili, Kili, look after the horses. Make sure you stay with them." said Thorin getting down from his horse. I got down and started to unpack. " Will you join us after you are done?" asked Kili pulling the leather strap out of my hair that had kept a braid in place. " Yes." I said smiling. I punched his arm and grabbed my leather strap. Kili grinned and walked away rubbing his arm." A farmer and his family used to live here." said Gandalf. "Oin, Gloin, get a fire going." commanded Thorin."Aye!" Oin replied. " I think it would be wiser to move on. We could make for the Hidden Valley." said Gandalf. ". " I have told you already, I will not go near that place." Said Thorin walking among the ruins of the house and then facing Gandalf. "Why, not? The elves could help us. We could get food, rest , advice." Said Gandalf." Isn't it enough we have one among us? I do not need their advice." Said Thorin with disdain. "We have a map we cannot read. Lord Elrond could help us." Said Gandalf." Help? A dragon attacks Erebor. What help came from the elves? Orcs plunder Moria...desecrate our sacred halls. The elves looked on and did nothing. And you ask me to seek out the very people who betrayed my grandfather. Who betrayed my father." Said Thorin stubbornly. " You are neither of them. I did not give you that map and key for you to hold onto the past." Said Gandalf getting slightly annoyed." I did not know they were yours to keep." Retorted Thorin. Gandalf shook his head and angrily started to walk off." Everything alright? Gandalf, where are you going?" asked Bilbo as Gandalf passed him." To seek the company of the only one around here who's got sense." Said Gandalf still walking away." And who's that?" Continued Bilbo." Myself, Mr. Baggins! I've had enough of dwarves for one day." Said Gandalf disappearing around the corner." Come on, Bombur, we're hungry." Said Thorin after watching Gandalf leave. " Is he coming back?" Bilbo asked Balin. Balin tilted his head and gave Bilbo a unsure look.

Fili, Kili ,and I led Kellis and the ponies a small ways away from camp so they could graze and rest. All three of us sat on the grass with our backs to some rocks watching the ponies. The sun was starting to set and I began to sing.

(Sindarin)  
>Uich gwennen na 'wanath ah na dhнn.<br>An uich gwennen na ringyrn ambar hen.  
>Boe naid bain gwannathar,<br>Boe cuil ban firitha.  
>Boe naer gwannathach<p>

(English)  
>'You are not bound to loss and silence.<br>For you are not bound to the circles of this world.  
>All things must pass away,<br>All life is doomed to fade...  
>Sorrowing you must go, [and yet you are not without hope]<p>

**A/N sorry it took me so long to write this chapter :P I am not completely satisfied with it and I plan on revising it if I can later on. I will not have the next chapter up for a while because I am writing another story about Legolas :) Check it out when I post it please! **


	5. Chapter 5

Hey guys! I'm sorry it is taking me so long to post another chapter. I have been super busy because of the holidays. However I will be revising both my stories. I feel like I rushed my Kili story. Tauriels character will be changed. Not because someone argued that Tauriel was not like that, but because my sister and I agree that that sort of character is very annoying in a story. Again sorry for the wait! ~ Bethani


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